Saturday, February 9, 2013

The Banality of Reality


Today I woke up, relieved myself in the bathroom, looked at my ugly mug in the mirror, washed every inch of my body in the shower before scrambling my eggs. You want to see that? I don't blame you. Also, sang a little jingle, which resembled the sound of a cat getting ravaged by a giraffe. You like my crooning? Hell I can understand that. If it were sensationalised you might take a peek though since people across the world do so every night when they groove into that spot on their couch and click POWER. 80% of our creative soul has been compromised through the genre of reality television. We've allowed the birth of the antichrist and it comes to us in the chameleon like face of grease ball guidos, botoxed housewives/socialites and one-dimensional smiling characters. 

Television shows with no creative merit have charmed us through sensationalism and buffoonery. We are all guiltier than Simpson, Casey Anthony and Nasty Nick. We've watched with a glazed look as the devil squirted out spawns such as Jersey Whore, Come and Defile with me, My Super Greed Material Fiend and Ireland's got Flatulence. The sensationalised wool of banality has been pulled over our eyes!

Real life is bland enough without turning on the television and revising the sheer excitement of going to the bathroom or waiting for the fucking toast to pop. If it isn't the supposed "edginess" of fornication within a sea of fake tan and hair products, then its nauseating spectacle of talentless cretins pouring out their emotions in a cringing fashion. If we aren't watching an Oompa Loompa looking creature throwing tampons at her roommate or washed up brown-nosing, has-been sucking ass (metaphorically speaking of course, I'm not too proud to say I wouldn't watch that) then, heck!, that's just not good television. 

This sad state of affairs brings democracy into question. Should we be subjected to this excess of banal trash week in and week out? For now unfortunately yes, but it makes baby Jesus cry, and by God if he saw this act of crumbling civilisation now, he'd be spinning on his cross faster than the Wheel of Fortune.

True originality and creativity, which help evolve our brains are being overlooked for reality television. In Ireland, The Rubberbandits are the only true original creativity to be produced in this country since Father Ted. The Roman Empire fell due to the apex of self indulgence, what's more self indulgent than watching ourselves eat, sleep and shit.

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